Work Woes #3

Had a 1-1 with boss this morning, and asked him for his advice on the areas where he thought that I should improve on, and he mentioned that I'll need to get more engaged in Team discussions like what we had last week.

And he also mentioned that it was the Sales prez who indicated to him that he doesn't know much about me, which is why boss asked me to speak up more infront of sales prez.
This was exactly as I had analyzed.

Instead of just being in denial, I will agree to a certain extent that Sales prez doesn't know me that well since every single presentation that I had with him was cut short at the last minute.

It is easy to blame it on luck, that why is it that I always get the last few presentation slots and have to contend with unscheduled interventions that eats into my presentation.

Or I should really look into making these preparations for future presentations that the Sales prez is going to sit in:

• 2 decks of ppt:
• 1 for a full presentation with all figures - use when time is not a concern
• 1 for an Executive summary with key asks listed in priority that takes only 30% of the full ppt time
• Maneuvering the numbers to making the business look good by isolating singular large deal losses, instead of showing the numbers as is, while getting no chance to explain in details and getting blamed for poor business performance

And somehow, from the chat with boss, it seems that he isn't sympathetic to our region, nor does he have the patience to sit through a full explanation to understand the situation to offer his advice, like what my ex bosses used to do. But instead, he seeks quick and short answer to his questions and jumps into his own conclusions.

Well, every boss has his/her own style, and I can only try my best to figure out how to adapt to the pace, style and cadence of the current boss, and neither expect nor compare between the various bosses I had in the last 3 years.
Looking at the timeline, this is the 4th that I had in the last 3 years. Not a good thing...

Oh well, it's back to the job hunting board again and continue to look for alternatives.
Just wondering if I'll ever hit the actual 10 year mark in this company before I eventually leave, and also if I'm asked to leave, will there be a proper retrenchment package offered.

漂浮不定心不定
落地轻重智理情
兵荒马乱先擒王
刀光剑影心不慌

Work woes #2

Had been busy sending out lots of jobs applications based on my skill set rather than having a genuine thought about what I really want to do, or where do I want to move to

I Guess the stress and anxiety on the real possibility of losing my job and income, and the accompanying consequences on my dependents has really got to me, so much so that I was panicking last night

Recalled that I was talking to Tracy on the flight back to Sg, and just mentioned a random thought of me replacing a current incompetent PLM, may be the ideal situation for me. It caught her off guard and didn’t respond, so I guess she didn’t think much of me in that position either. Can’t really confide that much in her anymore

Mentioned this concern to Uncle after our 1-1 meeting, and he brought up some good points that I may had been pushing too hard on what I think is best suited for my region, and probably neglected the aspect of managing my boss’s business needs. Sometimes you have got to go with the flow and do what the boss thinks is good, even though you know very well that it wouldn’t work. Scoring more brownie points won’t hurt

Had breakfast with ZY this morning, and confided in him as well. As well as my concerns on not being given the credit for all the hard work that I had done in the background to finally get things off the ground, and someone else swooping in to claim credit for my work at the very moment that it is going to show results. Good advice from him that I should be more careful and talk to Bao to get him to be aware of the values that I had brought to the table and not go unrecognised. We also chatted about the possibility of joining the competition especially since they have a recent open req on Fiber PLM role, and thought that it may be a good career progression too, especially since I have the correct profile for that role

The biggest concern will be jumping ship to working with the opposition camp, may make me lose credit or part of my current network that I had built up over the years.
I’ll have no doubt that I will be able to fit into that role if given the opportunity

Thoughts that flashed across my mind immediately was on beating those that didn’t really appreciate my work or think highly of me if I were to work on the opposite camp. Bao, Sales prez, OF, V, etc

Talked to Des on this req and he confirmed that it is open, and will help me to do an internal referral.
He was also very confident that I was a good fit for this role. Just sent him my updated resume, and fingers crossed, pray that I get called for an interview soon

It had always been on my mind that I wouldn’t want to compete against my ex colleagues by joining the competition. But now the push comes to shove, then it’s just 你做初一，我做十五

Actually I felt a lot more confident and better after talking to Des this morning, compared to feeling so down and despondent yesterday and lost all appetite for the whole day, and still had to hide it from dear. It was so painful...

In the meantime, I will still put on a fight to show my capabilities to my new boss. So if it eventually boils down to my departure being a political move, I’ll have no regrets in making my move

Work Woes

This is something that I can't talk to my dear about, for the fear of her getting worried and all stressed up.

We had just made a purchase for a new home and another for investment, and which will require both of us to be holding down steady well paying jobs.

I had been in my current job for the last 10 years, which had been mostly smooth sailing, with my pay increasing steadily over the years to a relatively comfortable level.

However, I have a sense of doom looming over my current role now, as the Global Sales President has made his first move of removing the China from my existing portfolio by hiring a new person, which I'm supposed to help to interview

With my new boss that had just came onboard 3 months ago, whom isn't familiar with what I had done and achieved in the past, nor understood the challenges and needs of our region, will not be able to fully appreciate my capabilities or talents, especially when he is a new hire from the Sales President's ex-company.

At the same time, they had brought in another of their ex-staff from the same company for North America, and my replacement for China will be another of their ex-staff, which they had pulled out all stops to hire.

What made it more ominous was that I wasn't consulted or informed on my China replacement until I was asked to interview some candidates, and on further probing with my new boss and the sales president, the sales president just brushed me off, saying "this is your replacement" without any further explanation.

I felt really bad at that point in time.
Maybe it's my performance? Maybe I didn't manage to make a deep enough impact in China?
I chose to look at this the other way, that maybe the company is doing better now and could afford to invest more resources to expand our capacity, as what the China Sales VP had always wanted.

This played on my mind since Feb, that I had to be aware and cautious of the possibility that I may be booted out of the company. Whether be it on performance, or if it's political, there will be a huge price for me to pay at this point if the worst scenario is to play out.

In last week's Global team meeting, the Sales president was sitting in our team meeting, and while my counterparts went on and on about certain issues, my boss walked over to me twice, and whispered to me that he wanted me to speak up more infront of the Sales president. It sent chills down my spine at that point.

Was this a warning that the Sales president had put me on his namelist for clearance?

I have an inkling that the Sales president had a dislike for me over the last few years, and he had never really spoken to me directly in the eye and provided good advice on what can be further improved.

Perhaps this is it. Perhaps this may be the moment that he had been waiting for, to get rid of me so that he can bring his own crew in.

I'm not concerned about ego or anything at this point.
The biggest worry that I have is that if I were to lose my job and income now, it will worry and stress the hell out of dear and it will have a serious impact on our property investment.

Dear had always been skeptical and cautious on making the property investment, and I remember very clearly that her only wish is to have a roof over our heads, and to have enough to provide for our kids. Nothing luxurious or whatsoever.

It is at this very moment that I cast strong doubts and aspersions on myself that what had I done.
The fortune teller had mentioned 10 years ago to me that my life is filled with highs and lows.
大起大落，再起再落
If it were to happen to myself alone then it ain't such a big problem.
The problem is that if I don't do well now, it will affect dear and the kids.
That's by far my biggest worry.

Really feeling uncomfortable and stressed now
Don't have the appetite for food, nor can I find any more pleasure in activities that I used to enjoy.
寡欲不欢
First time in my last 10 years in this job, that I started to actively send resumes out for job applications.
First time I feel that this is a really serious threat..


At the same time, I can't show anything to dear or the family, and have to appear as if everything is as per normal in front of them.
Only Bro and 2 other close colleagues know about this.

Next course of action will be to seek guidance from my current boss on what he wants me to do next.
Perhaps also talk to my ex boss on his opinions as well
More importantly, step up on my job hunt and move on if possible

男人有泪不倾谈
一切忧愁自己扛
危机四伏风云路
转机或许就在灯火阑珊处

Sunday Swim Class #3 (17 Jan 2016)

Class Size: 4

No Time Trials

Observed common issues:

• Inconsistent stroke count per lap
• Overly wide kicks
• Over rotation
• Limited propulsion per stroke
• Unable to catch up with slightly faster tempo on tempo trainer

Key focus: Reduce kick size to increase propulsion
Worked on:

• Changed Reference point for tempo trainer to arm extension:
• Slows down the state of mind
• Increases the time spent in skating position - increase glide/stroke length
• Delayed 2 beat kick:
• Using the kick to amplify 0-45 instead of initiating 45-0
• Feeling the natural fall initiated by recovery arm instead of using kick to force the rotation
• Synchronized to water insertion point at mid forearm
• Overly wide kicks:
• Intro 6 beat kick timing with tempo trainer
• Intro 2 beat kick with no body rotation
• Scrunched toes 2 beat kick (locks hamstring) - smaller kick
• Over rotation:
• Demo difference between normal rotation and reduced rotation
• Need to reduce rotation angle to cope with higher tempo
• Reduced rotation angle reduces the need for a stronger kick - students kick much lesser.

Sunday Swim Class #2 (10 Jan 2016)

Class size: 5

Completed 180m Time Trial

Observed common issues:

• lack of understanding on how to complete a TT:
• taking too long to turn at the walls
• inconsistent focus
• Crossover during breathing
• Head tilting up during breathing
• Over rotation

Key focus: Lateral balance
Worked on:

• Ideal head position in water during breathing - pressing top of head down
• Deliberate pushing of leading hand outwards during breathing to reduce crossover
• Correction of leading hand position with aid of visual feedback during skating
• Over rotation - belly button pointing just outside of lane marking

Sunday Swim Club Class #1 (3 Jan 2016)

Class size: 1

750m Time Trial completed.

Observed swimming issues:

• Over-rotation
• Crossover
• Overflexing of knee during kick
• Head tilts up during breathing phase 
• Leading hand going too deep
• Irregular breathing pattern

Worked on:

• Leaking of air underwater
• Ideal head position during breathing
• Kicking:
• Ankle strap
• Above knee strap
• Manual correction
• Sliding of fingers forward in the water
• Crossover:
• Manual correction 
• Keeping hands outside of lane